I love the look and feel of Fall. It’s cooler. It’s colorful. The mosquitoes are hanging in there, but I’ve changed my attitude towards mosquito bites. I still don’t like mosquitoes or other blood suckers; however, I think that mosquito bites are proof that there is a God. Mosquito bites itch, and therefore, we don’t like to be bitten by mosquitoes. If mosquito bites didn’t itch, we might not mind being bitten by mosquitoes. Mosquitoes carry illnesses. Itchy mosquito bites motivate us to avoid being bitten by mosquitoes. There must be a benevolent higher power putting itchy stuff in mosquito bites which encourages us to avoid mosquito bites and the illnesses mosquitoes carry.
Uh oh, I digress. Frankly, I have digressed for so long, I no longer know what I have digressed from. Oh yes, Fall. Fall can be tough. Last year Phil went into the hospital on October 5th and did not come out alive. This year, I lost my dear friend Mela. This year, the pandemic has had a devastating impact on our way of life, lasting all the way into Fall (no state fair or Balloon Fiesta here in Albuquerque). Of course, we need to suck it up to get through it. Much like mosquito bites, discomfort usually has a positive aspect. We have to persevere to realize it.
I’m in the Fall of my life. It’s good. It’s the season of retirement. Last year retirement provided me with time to care for Phil during his final illness. This year it provided me with time to spend with my beloved friend, Mela and her family. Sheltering at home due to the pandemic, while retired, has provided me with time to think about what really matters. Here’s what I’ve come up with: what really matters is spending time with the people we love; looking for the good in people, giving to and serving others (even those we’ve never met). I miss Phil and I will miss Mela. It will hurt. I hope to use that pain as motivation to honor his and her memory. I’m going to look at the beauty of Fall and remember the beauty of my husband Phil and my friend Mela.
Proof there is a God: the beauty of the seasons; the beauty of memories; the beauty of giving and serving; the beauty of retirement, music, sunsets, sunrises, Fall; the love of family and friends; the itch of mosquito bites; and more (after all, I’m no theologian).
When you lose someone, you treasure your memories of that person. Memories keep them close. When you lose someone, you appreciate those who are still with you. Fall is an end to the growing season of Summer. It’s not THE end. We get the makings of pies, jellies and jams and stock for the pantry. Fall is both an end of the growing season and a time of harvest and plenty. Every season has its gifts.
3 thoughts on “Fall”
I’m sorry about the bites and itches
and your losses.
Fall is a beautiful season. A season of letting go.
Most of my immediate family died in the Fall. I plant pansies to remember them and get me through the Winter. They are glorious in the Spring.
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Thank you Andrea. I love the memorial advice. I hope you and yours are happy and well!
Sorry you’re hurting. But, you’re taking that hurt and using it as muse which is so powerful. Getting it out and sharing it takes the power to make you sad and allows you to share the burden. 🙏🏻
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